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We are young women open to dating other races, but being open doesn’t necessarily make finding a partner any easier. We’re tired of reading articles that tell us to widen our options as educated women and date men outside our race, because we are attempting this and it is making no difference.
Going through my contacts on Facebook reminds me that my girlfriends of colour have all been single significantly longer than my White female friends, who are often in and out of dating and relationships. Some may argue that our standards our ‘too high’, but would anyone say this to an educated White woman who only wanted to date White men?
Jem adds that she doesn’t want to have to explain to a White man why she wraps her head at night, and her friend told her, after recently becoming single that she wanted to give her parents a Black grandchild as her two brothers have mixed race children.
It seems that many Black women feel that it is our responsibility to preserve the Black community. Surely, a shared connection, chemistry and interests (which is so hard to find) are more important than having to explain to a man how a weave is sown in?
After realising that White men probably won’t walk up to me in the street and ask for a date, I tried internet dating on and off for a couple of years, and admittedly over 90% of the emails I received were from White men.
By: Carla Ford Have you ever considered if you lived in the UK, would men of others races be more openly receptive in showing their attraction towards Black women?
‘I remember distinctly going to my father and saying, “Dad, would you mind if I did marry a black woman one day?
” His response to me was, “As long as she looks good, I don't care what color she is'" Baker recalled.
Having Black men reinforce these stereotypes makes dating harder for us. A conversation I had with my friend Ally last week summarises the confusion among my girlfriends: ‘‘I want a man I connect with on every level, and I don’t care about their colour, but I’m just having no luck, I feel like I’ve been single forever!
Black men in Bristol don’t give us the time of day.