Horrible internet dating experiences
This form of dating can then turn into a game of playing the lottery with people.
This may come as a surprise, but a famous marriage researcher named John Gottman has stated that “People who have higher standards and higher expectations for their marriage have the best marriages, not the worst.” Similar to a self-fulfilling prophecy, people who hold higher standards for marriage may find a more satisfying one.But if you get caught up in the tidal wave of feelings without an anchor of rational thought and sober discernment, your thinking will become clouded by the excitement of the new relationship.Blindly following your heart’s wave of emotions, without your getting brain involved, can then quickly crash you onto the rocks of reality if the relationship ends. “You’re Being Too Picky.” People often say this to someone when they have turned down a seemingly viable guy or gal match.If absolutely nothing else, I hope you know that you do not ever have to share your story unless you feel safe and comfortable doing so, and .I know you can’t turn social media off at work, but I hope you can set times throughout the day where you allow yourself to take a break and either reach out to a friend for support or just take a few minutes to be quiet and not absorb further stories of trauma.It mostly comes from shortsighted anecdotes about their own personal experiences and what worked and didn’t work for them.Sometimes, we hear this advice so often we begin to believe it’s true, and we may even start doling it out ourselves.For example, some people might intentionally wait long periods to return a phone call/text message or generally act aloof to the relationship.Creating this unhealthy pursue-distance cycle may work for a while, but contrivance will ultimately leave the other person confused and feeling disrespected. Moreover, if your early stage of companionship is based on guile, what do you expect the latter part of the relationship to end up like?Lastly, if you follow the Golden Rule of “treating others as we would want to be treated,” then it will be the antidote to you manipulating others and game-playing. “Dating Is a Numbers Game.” It’s probably true that most of us will probably need to date at least a few people before we find our spouse.However, the view that you need to date as many people as possible to find the “right one” can be taken to the extreme.